This year I was lucky enough to have four Thanksgiving dinners. The first was a Thanksgiving pot luck at our November Board of Directors meeting. The second was at Takini School. Though Takini has its short comings (none of the kids have pencils, the school counselor teaches math because they're short on teachers, juniors do the same math packets as 8th graders and there are 8th graders who can't do 7x0, 1-1, or 22-19 without a calculator), it does try to keep the Lakota culture alive and one way they did this was by having a Thanksgiving lunch for the students that was also open to community members. The Y had a ham dinner for the kids on Wednesday. We had the kids go around the table and say what they were thankful for. Dylan, a recently turned seven YMCA regular said, "AMANDA!!!" :D Courtney, Andy, and I went to Medina's house on Thanksgiving to eat with her kids, brother, and mom. We had quite the feast--a ham, a turkey, sweet potato casserole, green bean casserole, stuffing, mashed potatoes, corn bread muffins, salad, five pies, a pineapple upside down cake etc etc. Kateri (Medina's 11 year old daughter) and I made the spirit plate, being careful to get a pinch of everything. The Lakota believe that the spirits can garner the energy from the food, even without ingesting it. Other than the spirit plate, my South Dakota Thanksgiving wasn't much different from my Wisconsin Thanksgivings.
Apparently someone came into Carol's office the other day and told her I was turning native--They asked me where something was and I pointed at it with my lips. I have no recollection of this so I guess I'm picking up on these cultural -isms subconsciously. Demi pointed out I've started using rez slang like "member" for "remember." More rez vernacular
I taught my first ballet class on Tuesday. I had 14 students--double of what I was guessing would show up. I even had two little boys stay. At first I thought it was because they're not allowed to stay for any other evening programming because our age minimum is 9 and I said that I would take anyone 5 and up in my ballet class, but they were totally into it! When I was welcoming the class I told them that ballet takes discipline and one of the boys (who is 6 or 7) piped up "and dancing!" I almost lost it laughing. Teaching was tough in a small space and using folding chairs for a barre. I only got through stretching and half of my barre work in an hour and I had planned for stretching, barre work, steps across the floor, and choreography. The kids were excited and hard to wrangle in at some points. I'll have to tweak my plans for next week. Every day since Tuesday someone's asked me when ballet is next or showed me their positions or arabesque. Never did I ever think I'd be teaching a ballet class, but I'm looking forward to next class as much as the kids!
You can beat yourself bloody on a brick wall of possibilities or you can succumb to the fact that you are trying your hardest and other people get it and are trying their best too. Change takes time. It takes generations.
On Friday I went to the wake for one of the young men who died in a head on collision with a semi on Halloween. I came home from work and told Carol I had to find something to wear, and she told me to go as is (black yoga pants, tennis shoes, and a sweatshirt) because if I changed I'd stick out and be way over dressed. She was right. Most people were in jeans and t-shirts. The wake was held in the multi purpose building in Dupree which is basically a gym with a kitchen and bathrooms and where we held the Halloween party. We walked in and signed the guest book, next to which were baskets of suckers and cigarettes. Family members were wearing memorial T-shirts for A.J., which I've noticed is a fairly common phenomenon in this community. A duo was playing guitar and singing hymns before the service started at 7pm. The casket was closed and draped with a star quilt in the four sacred colors (red, black, white, and yellow). A.J. was beheaded when his car went under the semi, but they put his head and body back together. Out here it is believed that the head and body must be reunited or the spirit cannot pass into the afterlife. Another young man was beheaded in a crash in neighboring Lantry. His head and body were never reunited and people say that his spirit haunts highway 212 in Lantry. Night or day you may see a young hitchhiker, but when you slow down to pick him up, he just waves you on. Members of the community brought star quilts or other blankets and piled them on a table. They would be given away the next day at the funeral in A.J.'s name. After both the wake and the funeral there is a meal. Community members also bring dishes to pass. There was a Catholic service for the wake and the entire rosary was said. After the service, friends and family hold vigil with the body through the night until the funeral and burial. The other young man who died with A.J.'s funeral is tomorrow in Red Scaffold. Carol wants me to go with her. We will go as long as the weather isn't too bad. There is a winter storm warning for tonight through tomorrow night calling for freezing rains, wind, and four to seven inches of snow.
Courtney, Andy, John, and I went and got dinner tonight at the Ranch House Cafe around 7. Courtney drove us and we swung by the Y on the way there because we saw kids playing outside. Two boys asked if they could use Andy's phone because they live in Thunder Butte (an hour and a half away) and their ride never showed up at 6. They called a few numbers, but no one picked up. We said we'd swing by on our way back from dinner so they could try again and they did, to no avail. Luckily, the boys have an auntie who lives in Dupree that they could go stay with. As we drove away from her house, I told Courtney I couldn't believe it--this made me angry. But then I took it back. I realized I was just saying that, because it should make me angry, but really, I felt nothing at all. This, and much worse, has become normal. That's pretty scary, considering I've only been out here for about four months. The emotion I've been feeling the most lately is frustration. I'm frustrated that kids' rides never show up, or that people never mean to pick their kids up anyways and that we as Y staff walk them home after programming in the cold and dark. I'm frustrated that a three year with no shoes can wander the streets here with no repercussions for his parents. I'm frustrated that parents call or come looking for their kids at the Y, when we haven't seen the kids here all day. I'm frustrated that 20 something year old boys lose their lives in head on collisions with semi trucks because they were driving in the wrong lane on 212. While I think the Y is a great resource, I'm frustrated that it has to be. I'm frustrated that, as an outsider and volunteer, I am more involved with this organization than its Board of Directors. I'm frustrated that everything I've just said completely contradicts the quote I've chosen for this month's blog page. I'm frustrated with the blurry line between paternalism and sovereignty, which allows for children to be out of school for 30 days, with no repercussions, because no one is checking. It also allows for subpar education and health care. I'm frustrated that broken arms don't get cast for 20 days because someone can't afford a drive to Rapid City and IHS can't set broken bones. I'm frustrated by how many things I see broken and want to fix, but have no idea where to begin. On a lighter note...Here's a picture of Tiny Man, my favorite rez dog, because he is just so outrageous looking. He belongs to two tween boys, Keenan and Jobe, who are cousins and who are my neighbors. Today, Tiny Man, threw up on the Y's deck because Jobe had been feeding him chips. Flaming hot cheetos are all the rage in Dupree. The boys love this dog dearly. He follows them everywhere. Keenan almost never talks to me unless it's about his dogs.
Over the course of Thursday, Friday, and Saturday, I've worked 32 hours. 'Course that means I'm sick again--head cold. After my year out here I hope my immune system will be a tank. Anyways, we went all out with our Halloween party this year. On Friday, we had a Halloween Carnival at the community building in town. Over 85 kids attended plus some of their parents. We had stations of games, face painting, and a photo booth. Once a kid completed an activity, they got a sticker, and once they earned three stickers, they could go get a prize. We also had fun snacks and a haunted house. I got to scare in the haunted house, which was a blast. This kids begged me all October to dress up as Annabelle from the Conjuring, so I surprised them and did. They called me Annabelle all night. I sat in a chair by a strobe light in the haunted house and cried, screaming "help me!" and "mommy." Sometimes I would crawl after them. Even though the kids knew it was me, they were still afraid. I had kids crawling over other kids trying to get away from me. One boy lost a shoe scooting under a desk instead of going on the route past me. Even today when I went to the grocery store kids are still talking to me about how scary I was as Annabelle. After the party we had a Hocus Pocus movie showing back at the Y. I'm glad that the party was a success because we put a lot of work into it making snacks, decorations, games, and the haunted house. Yesterday, we had the Monster Dash, a 5k run/walk in your Halloween costume, which ended at the Y where there was an Indian taco/ rummage sale. We are trying to raise money for our Christmas party, which will be our next big feat.
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AuthorMy people understand that you children are sacred. You are precious. You are our future. -Wallace Black Elk, Lakota spiritual leader ArchivesCategories |